What makes human beings more unique than every other creature on earth is the amount of time we spend participating in activities that are not real. Our ability to imagine transports us to other worlds through books, movies, video games, television, or just plain daydreaming. And what makes this uniquely human characteristic even more interesting is that we enjoy these imaginative experiences because our brains don't distinguish them from the real ones. We cry over the sad ending of a book, are scared by horror movies, touched by a sentimental note, feel joy listening to music, and get a rush of adrenaline when competing against a video game. Our experiences and perceptions aren't just shaped by what is real and personal, but also by what is imagined and interpreted.

This is just as true with our relationships. The way one feels about another individual or about an organization is not only shaped by their personal, face-to-face interactions, but equally by the virtual experiences that may represent that person or organization. Every email, every contract, every advertisement, and every YouTube video creates an experience that is often indistinguishable to our brains. We find the ad funny, we find the person or company funny. We believe the contract is fair and transparent, we believe the person or organization is fair and transparent. We find the software program or phone app to be insightful and proactive in answering our questions or solving our problems, and we believe the person or company is insightful and proactive in solving our problems. You get the point.

If you want to build loyal relationships, then you need to make sure the virtual experiences you are creating for your customers, clients, members, suppliers, and employees are communicating the same loyalty-building messages that you are expected to deliver personally. Because, frankly, their brains won't see the difference.